Levitas

Heracleum Persicum · Post by **Heracleum Persicum** » Tue Sep 23, 2014 12:12 pm

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Looking for a JOB

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Typhoon · Post by **Typhoon** » Tue Sep 23, 2014 1:39 pm

Typhoon · Post by **Typhoon** » Wed Sep 24, 2014 9:56 pm

Doc · Post by **Doc** » Thu Sep 25, 2014 3:15 am

Typhoon wrote:

True story

My phone rang years ago my phone rang in the middle of the night. I got up walked into the other room and answered it. I woman with a fairly sexy voice answered and Said "It is really cold tonight. It would be really nice if someone came over and warm me up" So I answered her. "Sure what is your address"

Actually realizing my wife was in the next room I just said "Sorry you have the wrong number" So now you know how it is that I am still walking the earth.

Typhoon · Post by **Typhoon** » Thu Sep 25, 2014 5:37 pm

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Wonder if the coach is Sherrif Bart from Blazing Saddles . . .

Hoosiernorm · Post by **Hoosiernorm** » Fri Sep 26, 2014 1:55 pm

Typhoon wrote:

http://www.tmz.com/2014/09/23/woman-wit ... rosthesis/

YMix · Post by **YMix** » Fri Sep 26, 2014 3:31 pm

Nonc Hilaire · Post by **Nonc Hilaire** » Sun Sep 28, 2014 4:07 pm

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Typhoon · Post by **Typhoon** » Mon Sep 29, 2014 2:28 am

Nonc Hilaire · Post by **Nonc Hilaire** » Mon Sep 29, 2014 8:18 pm

An Omagh plumber tunnelled a hole from under his bed to the local pub 800 feet from his house over the course of 15 years, a court heard today.

Patsy Kerr had been summonsed to Omagh County Court after it emerged he had been the cause of a collapsed sewage pipe from a neighbouring house. Kerr told the court about his secret tunnel and the reasons behind it:

“The wife has a bad snore on her and after watching the Shawshank Redemption on RTE one night in 1994, I decided to do something about it so I waited til she was in a deep sleep and then set about digging a hole under the bed in the direction of the pub. I used all manner of tools from spoons to a heavy duty tunnel boring machine I managed to sneak down there when she was at the shops. It wasn’t until 2009 that I hit the jackpot and came up through the women’s toilet mop and bucket room.”

Kerr explained how he spent the last five years heading to the pub via his tunnel at 11pm before returning at 1am, undetected by his deep sleeping wife:

“To be honest I was sort of glad I was caught. She was always smelling drink off me in the morning and I was explaining it away as a natural odour. But recently I was finding myself singing rebel songs and stuff coming back up the tunnel and it was only a matter of time before I was caught anyhow. The landlord was also wondering how I was just appearing out of nowhere at the same time every night and disappearing from the women’s toilets.”

The tunnel was finally discovered after the DOE performed a survey on a sewage problem which turned out to be caused by a pipe Kerr had hit accidentally, causing sewage to leak into his tunnel over five years. The judge questioned Kerr’s wife as to why she never smelt the sewage odours from her husband. Mrs Kerr simply shrugged.

http://tyronetribulations.com/2014/09/2 ... -15-years/

Heracleum Persicum · Post by **Heracleum Persicum** » Tue Sep 30, 2014 4:27 pm

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The White House, West Wing - First Floor

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Heracleum Persicum · Post by **Heracleum Persicum** » Wed Oct 01, 2014 7:58 pm

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Typhoon · Post by **Typhoon** » Thu Oct 02, 2014 4:55 pm

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Parodite · Post by **Parodite** » Thu Oct 02, 2014 9:05 pm

Nonc Hilaire · Post by **Nonc Hilaire** » Sat Oct 04, 2014 5:43 pm

US Congressional inquiry re: the island of Guam.

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Heracleum Persicum · Post by **Heracleum Persicum** » Sat Oct 04, 2014 8:40 pm

: ISIS recruiting.jpg (127.41 KiB) Viewed 1885 times

Heracleum Persicum · Post by **Heracleum Persicum** » Sun Oct 05, 2014 12:22 am

: durex.gif (69.63 KiB) Viewed 1881 times

Parodite · Post by **Parodite** » Sun Oct 05, 2014 12:14 pm

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Hoosiernorm · Post by **Hoosiernorm** » Sun Oct 05, 2014 12:54 pm

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Nonc Hilaire · Post by **Nonc Hilaire** » Mon Oct 06, 2014 12:03 am

Nonc Hilaire · Post by **Nonc Hilaire** » Mon Oct 06, 2014 12:04 am

Typhoon · Post by **Typhoon** » Mon Oct 06, 2014 2:23 am

Nonc Hilaire wrote:

Brilliant.

Typhoon · Post by **Typhoon** » Mon Oct 06, 2014 2:24 am

Nonc Hilaire · Post by **Nonc Hilaire** » Mon Oct 06, 2014 8:36 pm

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Typhoon · Post by **Typhoon** » Tue Oct 07, 2014 3:42 pm

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