Demon of Undoing wrote:
And if the Lord doesn't do that which he seemingly promised? Is he a liar, or is there perhaps an entire " church" that really has no idea what was even meant by the term " Holy Spirit"? We only wish that applied just to Charismatics.
It's entirely within the realm of possibility.
One thing is here we aren't trying to save churches, Salvation is a selfish and individual act. Where I part ways with a large portion of the human population is that if Islam was revealed to me, or the Hindu, or the Ooga booga tribe as God's dispensation I would change teams in a heartbeat. I don't really have a dog in the fight. And I will admit that it was later in life that I came to that conclusion, an idea I wasn't seeking. Who cares what my family thinks.
The problem with having to wait at all is that it is contrary to what scripture teaches. There is no record of anybody receiving the HS ( in whatever way that is defined) as anything other than a slam-bang moment of holy fire on the mountain.
Still small voice.
Beyond that, having some charismatic ( and this is the linguistic root for all the gifts of the spirit) dispensation that " confirms" faith is one of those things you can have even when you really don't- but you can convince yourself that you do, simply by staying ignorant.
Collingwood is a rare bird, IME, in feeling that assurance. All I ever felt was alone in my own skull. Pure intuition is a poor way of running a faith, anyway. It winds up being all Joel Osteen, all the time. If you're lucky.
Well seeing that I'm between the two of you I can actually relate. I had that period of emptiness and I've had the other, so what should I tell you? Words didn't do much for me at the time either. Maybe consider the teachings of Paul, that the gifts of the spirit, or how the spirit shows up, are rather diverse.
Everybody wants to be a prophet I guess but it happens so rarely. In my time of humbling myself ( or rather, was humbled) to a sufficient point I had to realize that more important than being able to call down hellfire or angels was being grateful for the simple knowledge and the path back home.
The only suggestion if you will I have is to look at your preoccupation with it all to begin with. You're hanging around for some reason. Being born in it is not sufficient reason, kids leave the church and don't give it a second thought all the time. The root may be there.