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Scientific/Math Humour
Scientific/Math Humour
"I fancied myself as some kind of god....It is a sort of disease when you consider yourself some kind of god, the creator of everything, but I feel comfortable about it now since I began to live it out.” -- George Soros
Re: Scientific/Math Humor
May the gods preserve and defend me from self-righteous altruists; I can defend myself from my enemies and my friends.
Re: Scientific/Math Humor
Dissociated Press (DP) — FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
Physicists identify new fundamental particle
May herald a new particle family and restructuring of the Standard Model
Geneva, Switzerland — August 2018
Keywords: hypino, shinyon, blockchain
High energy particle physicists at the CERN (Conseil Européen pour la Recherche Nullité) facility have confirmed the existence of the long-conjectured hypino (hy-PEE-no). It is thought to be the first member of a new class of particles known as shinyons (SHY-nee-ons), distinct from bosons and fermions.
Unlike other subatomic particles, hypinos carry no charge, and have neither rest nor relativistic mass. Their only defining quantum property is spin. Hypinos are thought to be the fundamental unit of marketing hyperbole. To date, hypinos are the only known members of the proposed class of shinyons, which are of especial interest to tech investors and holders of the MBA degree. Dr. Martin Waugh, of the Institute for Advanced Squander, further posits that the hypino may be the carrier of the so-called “weak-minded force”, a mutual repulsion between fools and their money. It is theorized that, upon sufficiently accelerated spin, hypinos transform into super-excited hyperinos, detectable only by Chief Information Officers.
The discovery of the hypino is recounted by Dr. Robert Crawford and Dr. Robert Jensen as follows:
“It was a Friday afternoon, and we and our colleagues were returning from a long lunch. Maintenance on the Large Hadron Collider (LHC) was scheduled to start Saturday morning, and the apparatus would be unavailable for two months. We were in a ‘what the hell’ kind of mood, so we thought we'd take a fantasy shot, just for grins and giggles.
“We had a few leftover Higgs Bosons from 2012 on the shelf, so our lowly lab technician, Garth Dennis, breech-loaded them into the beast , set up a blockchain for the target, positioned the extremely sensitive Swindleometer at the intended point of collision, energized the superconducting electromagnets, and let it rip. Upon collision, the blockchain shattered into a shower of the elusive hypinos. Examination of the debris field revealed that the blockchain and all of our cash were gone! Apparently the hypinos were entangled with our funding.”
There may be natural sources of hypinos. The strongest natural emitters appear to be located in Redmond, Washington, and Armonk, New York.
May the gods preserve and defend me from self-righteous altruists; I can defend myself from my enemies and my friends.
Re: Scientific/Math Humor
The classic.
May the gods preserve and defend me from self-righteous altruists; I can defend myself from my enemies and my friends.
- NapLajoieonSteroids
- Posts: 8565
- Joined: Fri Dec 23, 2011 7:04 pm
Re: Scientific/Math Humor
Tjh3JIuEYUI
From the first comment below the video:
From the first comment below the video:
A physicist, an engineer and a mathematician each enter a room containing a bucket of water, and a garbage can that is burning.
The physicist looks at the fire then looks at the bucket of water. Pulls out a sheet of paper and calculates the exact amount of water required to put the fire out, carefully measures it from the bucket and dumps it on the fire with not a drop wasted.
The engineer enters the room looks at the fire then looks at the bucket, grabs the bucket and dumps it on the fire and puts it out.
The mathematician enters the room, looks at the fire, then looks at the bucket. then looks at the fire again, and looks at the bucket again. He puts his arms in the air and yells “A SOLUTION EXISTS!!” and walks out of the room.
Re: Scientific/Math Humor
May the gods preserve and defend me from self-righteous altruists; I can defend myself from my enemies and my friends.
Re: Scientific/Math Humor
That sums it up.NapLajoieonSteroids wrote: ↑Sun May 19, 2019 10:17 am Tjh3JIuEYUI
From the first comment below the video:
A physicist, an engineer and a mathematician each enter a room containing a bucket of water, and a garbage can that is burning.
The physicist looks at the fire then looks at the bucket of water. Pulls out a sheet of paper and calculates the exact amount of water required to put the fire out, carefully measures it from the bucket and dumps it on the fire with not a drop wasted.
The engineer enters the room looks at the fire then looks at the bucket, grabs the bucket and dumps it on the fire and puts it out.
The mathematician enters the room, looks at the fire, then looks at the bucket. then looks at the fire again, and looks at the bucket again. He puts his arms in the air and yells “A SOLUTION EXISTS!!” and walks out of the room.
xPzR_D9qKeo
May the gods preserve and defend me from self-righteous altruists; I can defend myself from my enemies and my friends.
- NapLajoieonSteroids
- Posts: 8565
- Joined: Fri Dec 23, 2011 7:04 pm
Re: Scientific/Math Humor
Colonel Sun wrote: ↑Thu Oct 24, 2019 10:21 pmThat sums it up.NapLajoieonSteroids wrote: ↑Sun May 19, 2019 10:17 am Tjh3JIuEYUI
From the first comment below the video:
A physicist, an engineer and a mathematician each enter a room containing a bucket of water, and a garbage can that is burning.
The physicist looks at the fire then looks at the bucket of water. Pulls out a sheet of paper and calculates the exact amount of water required to put the fire out, carefully measures it from the bucket and dumps it on the fire with not a drop wasted.
The engineer enters the room looks at the fire then looks at the bucket, grabs the bucket and dumps it on the fire and puts it out.
The mathematician enters the room, looks at the fire, then looks at the bucket. then looks at the fire again, and looks at the bucket again. He puts his arms in the air and yells “A SOLUTION EXISTS!!” and walks out of the room.
xPzR_D9qKeo
Re: Scientific/Math Humor
"Complex field" means the set of complex [real plus imaginary | a + i * b] numbers . . .
May the gods preserve and defend me from self-righteous altruists; I can defend myself from my enemies and my friends.
Re: Scientific/Math Humor
May the gods preserve and defend me from self-righteous altruists; I can defend myself from my enemies and my friends.
Re: Scientific/Math Humor
May the gods preserve and defend me from self-righteous altruists; I can defend myself from my enemies and my friends.
Re: Scientific/Math Humor
There are spots in Japan that come close.
May the gods preserve and defend me from self-righteous altruists; I can defend myself from my enemies and my friends.
Re: Scientific/Math Humor
May the gods preserve and defend me from self-righteous altruists; I can defend myself from my enemies and my friends.
- Miss_Faucie_Fishtits
- Posts: 2172
- Joined: Sat Dec 17, 2011 9:58 pm
Re: Scientific/Math Humor
Err..... the rule at our workbench is Plug and Pray.......'>.........
She irons her jeans, she's evil.........
Re: Scientific/Math Humor
Maybe, maybe not... Maybe Boltzman just made a discovery he didn't want to share.Miss_Faucie_Fishtits wrote: ↑Wed Dec 04, 2019 2:09 amErr..... the rule at our workbench is Plug and Pray.......'>.........
9UfQb_-XAuY
Perhaps he was afraid that people would want to know what being Ludwig Boltzmann was like.
2UuRFr0GnHM
"I fancied myself as some kind of god....It is a sort of disease when you consider yourself some kind of god, the creator of everything, but I feel comfortable about it now since I began to live it out.” -- George Soros
Re: Scientific/Math Humor
May the gods preserve and defend me from self-righteous altruists; I can defend myself from my enemies and my friends.
Re: Scientific/Math Humor
Some guys are destined to be monks.
May the gods preserve and defend me from self-righteous altruists; I can defend myself from my enemies and my friends.
Re: Scientific/Math Humor
qU_j5cQ2sfQ
May the gods preserve and defend me from self-righteous altruists; I can defend myself from my enemies and my friends.
Re: Scientific/Math Humor
Pre PowerPoint.
May the gods preserve and defend me from self-righteous altruists; I can defend myself from my enemies and my friends.
Re: Scientific/Math Humor
"The Ascent of Man"Colonel Sun wrote: ↑Thu Dec 26, 2019 7:17 pm Pre PowerPoint.
81209596_2851851331531531_704316761859686400_n.jpg
"I fancied myself as some kind of god....It is a sort of disease when you consider yourself some kind of god, the creator of everything, but I feel comfortable about it now since I began to live it out.” -- George Soros
Re: Scientific/Math Humor
"I fancied myself as some kind of god....It is a sort of disease when you consider yourself some kind of god, the creator of everything, but I feel comfortable about it now since I began to live it out.” -- George Soros
Re: Scientific/Math Humor
May the gods preserve and defend me from self-righteous altruists; I can defend myself from my enemies and my friends.
Re: Scientific/Math Humor
[May the gods preserve and defend me from self-righteous altruists; I can defend myself from my enemies and my friends.
Re: Scientific/Math Humor
May the gods preserve and defend me from self-righteous altruists; I can defend myself from my enemies and my friends.